Fatwa ID: 06662
Answered by: Maulana Burhaan Rahman
Question:
Assalamualaykum, I wanted to help understand whether household duties were wajib for a wife or not. I have read Bahishti Zewar by Hadhrat Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanavi (رحمة الله عليه) that it is waajib for a woman if they are not upper class and similar from Mufti Mahmood Hasan Gangohi in his Fatawa Mahmoodiya, I understand this and see the virtues of this, especially times like this. But I have other Hanafi scholars also say that it’s just a moral duty and they can say no if they want. Could you clarify this for me and if it is a difference of opinion, could u explain the strongest one?
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
Answer:
Listening to what Allah has said and looking at the prophet/his companions and the womenfolk/female companions of the prophet’s era is the greatest approach to replicating the roles of the husband and wife.
By the will of Allah, the best way to answer this question is to talk about both sides so we understand complementary and harmonizing roles. Before talking about what the wife is to do we must also understand what the husband must adhere to (which relates to the house as well etc.).
Allah SWT mentions in the Qur’an:
وَعلَى الْمَوْلُودِ لَهُ رِزْقُهُنَّ وَكِسْوَتُهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ
“The mother’s provisions and clothing expenses must be covered by the child’s father on a reasonable basis”. [Surah Baqarah verse 223]
The wife of Abu Sufyan, Hind, and the daughter of ‘Utba, came before Allah’s Messenger (SAW) and said: “Abu Sufyan is a miserly person. He doesn’t provide appropriate maintenance for my family and me, so I’m forced to take from his fortune without his awareness. Do I still have any sins?” the beloved messenger (SAW) mentioned:
خُذِي مِنْ مَالِهِ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ مَا يَكْفِيكِ وَيَكْفِي بَنِيكِ
“Take from his property what is usual that may be enough for you and your children, said Allah’s Messenger.” [Muslim Hadeeth no: 1714]
Therefore, the husband must provide for the family, as the wife needs a home, food, supplies, and money (without her spending from her own at all). All of this is carried out per Allah’s command with sincere love and kindness. Live your lives in devotion and affection for one another. According to our beloved Prophet (SAW):
وَاسْتَوْصُوا بِالنِّسَاءِ فَإِنَّ الْمَرْأَةَ خُلِقَتْ مِنْ ضِلَعٍ وَإِنَّ أَعْوَجَ شَىْءٍ فِي الضِّلَعِ أَعْلاَهُ إِنْ ذَهَبْتَ تُقِيمُهُ كَسَرْتَهُ وَإِنْ تَرَكْتَهُ لَمْ يَزَلْ أَعْوَجَ اسْتَوْصُوا بِالنِّسَاءِ خَيْرًا
Be gentle to women because they came from (take the analogy of) ribs. And the top of a rib is the one that is most curved. It will shatter if you try to straighten it, and if you leave it that way, it will stay curved. So act kindly towards women. [Muslim Hadeeth no: 1468]
Men are generally and mostly the breadwinners of the family. The companions and the Prophet were kind-hearted and also used to help out in the house as well when possible. When A’isha (RA) was asked what the Prophet did at home (in terms of work), she replied:
انَ فِي مِهْنَةِ أَهْلِهِ، فَإِذَا سَمِعَ الأَذَانَ خَرَجَ
“He used to work for his family and would leave the house when he heard the Adhan (call to prayer).” [Bukhari Hadeeth no: 5363]
Now, we shall talk about the roles of the wife Inshaa Allah concerning household duties which seems to be the main body of the question.
Allah SWT mentions in the Qur’an:
وَقَرْنَ فِي بُيُوتِكُنَّ وَلَا تَبَرَّجْنَ تَبَرُّجَ الْجَاهِلِيَّةِ الْأُولَىٰ
And stay in your homes and do not go about displaying your allurements as in the former Time of Ignorance. [Surah Ahzab verse 33]
In Tafseer Al Waseet it mentions a beautiful explanation regarding this verse:
الزمن يا نساء النبي صلّى الله عليه وسلّم بيوتكن، ولا تخرجن منها إلا لحاجة مشروعة، ومثلهن في ذلك جميع النساء المسلمات،
قال بعض العلماء: والحكمة في هذا الأمر: أن ينصرفن إلى رعاية شئون بيوتهن، وتوفير وسائل الحياة المنزلية التي هي من خصائصهن، ولا يحسنها الرجال، وإلى تربية الأولاد في عهد الطفولة وهي من شأنهن
وقد جرت السنة الإلهية بأن أمر الزوجين قسمة بينهما، فللرجال أعمال من خصائصهم لا يحسنها النساء، وللنساء أعمال من خصائصهن لا يحسنها الرجال، فإذا تعدى أحد الفريقين عمله، اختل النظام في البيت والمعيشة.
وقال صاحب الظلال ما ملخصه: والبيت هو مثابة المرأة التي تجد فيها نفسها
إن خروج المرأة للعمل كارثة على البيت قد تبيحها الضرورة،
“It necessitates you to stay at home, O women of the Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, and do not leave them except for a legitimate need, and all Muslim women are to take heed of this.
Some scholars said: The wisdom in this matter is that they devote themselves to taking care of the affairs of their homes and fulfilling the household activities which is a constant part of a woman’s talent and characteristics and it’s not the best quality for a man (to do the same). For the woman to stay at home helps with the upbringing of children during childhood, which is their concern (and a form of worship).
And the divine Sunnah has been spoken about that the matter of the spouses is divided between them. Men, they do things that are part of their own characteristics that women do not have conventionally. And women, do things that are part of their characteristics that men do not have conventionally. So if one of the two parties contravenes his/her work, the order in the home and living is disrupted.
Sahib Al Dhilal mentions in his summary: The house is the place of the woman in which she finds herself (peace within herself).
A woman’s going out to work is less ideal for the home that may be permitted by necessity”. End quote.
Fatimah the daughter of our beloved Prophet (SAW) complained to the Prophet about the damaging effects the stone hand-mill had on her hand.
He stated:
أَلاَ أَدُلُّكُمَا عَلَى خَيْرٍ مِمَّا سَأَلْتُمَاهُ، إِذَا أَخَذْتُمَا مَضَاجِعَكُمَا فَكَبِّرَا اللَّهَ أَرْبَعًا وَثَلاَثِينَ، وَاحْمَدَا ثَلاَثًا وَثَلاَثِينَ، وَسَبِّحَا ثَلاَثًا وَثَلاَثِينَ، فَإِنَّ ذَلِكَ خَيْرٌ لَكُمَا مِمَّا سَأَلْتُمَاهُ
“Should I suggest an alternative to what you’ve asked for? Say “Subhan Allah,” “Alhamdulillah,” and “Allahu Akbar” 34 times before going to bed since doing so is better for you than using a servant (to carry out your tasks instead).” [Bukhari Hadeeth no: 3113]
Given that the Prophet told his OWN daughter to bear patience, it shows that it’s not a biased thought to understand that women keep household duties in order and the fact that it holds more value in the sight of Allah for the wife to be a nurturer of children and regulator of the abode.
So in conclusion, it is not obligatory for a woman to stay at home but the extra reward lies when she pleases her lord Allah the Almighty and keeps direction in household undertakings as Allah SWT mentions.
We ask Allah SWT to bless the husband and the wife and bless each other with bliss in each other’s life.
Only Allah knows best.
Written by Maulana Burhaan Rahman
Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham
