Fatwa ID: 08244

Answered by:  Aalimah Saleha Bukhari Islam

Question:

Assalamualaikum Sheikh. I hope you are well.

Recently I asked a question on hurmat e musaharah in this fatwa, fatwa ID: 07762. I had a couple more questions that I wanted to ask.

My first question is that, as I mentioned in the previous question, as best as I can remember, lust was already there as it usually happens at night without any specific reason. I am having doubts that on that night maybe I touched her with lust other than that event also. But as best as I can remember, I don’t remember touching her other than that event in my life. But I am getting waswas that maybe I touched her other than that also because, when I was a child, I used to get scared at night, so I used to sleep with her. So, on that night I was also scared. And I was sleeping when this whole event happened, so that’s why I have a lot of doubts.

Second question: I want to ask, if there is no desire for intercourse, does hurmat e musaharah establish?

Another question is: if someone is uncertain about what happened, does hurmat e musaharah establish or not?

In conclusion, I don’t remember any clear event where I touched her other than the event I mentioned in the previous question. Does hurmat establish or not?

The things on which I am certain are:
– The touch was on cloth
– There was no desire for intercourse
– My feelings didn’t increase when I touched

But I am getting a lot of doubts.

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيْم
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

Answer:

Wa alaikum as-salām wa rahmatullāhi wa barakātuh,

Islam has placed many safe boundaries within the family structure for safeguarding relationships of the womb. Thus, when a mature (baligh) male or female touches the opposite gender, separated by a thin barrier between them whereby the body warmth is felt and sparking off a growth in desire/lust, then Hurmat al-Musaharah is said to be established. The increasing of desire (shahwah) is given precedence to when this occurs.

Engaging in unlawful sexual relationships is a major sin in Islam. However, this major sin is further enhanced when such acts are committed with one’s mother/father, sister/brother, or daughter/son, because it severs the bonds of kinship. Additionally, it is a direct violation of the rights of those with whom one is enjoined to uphold the ties of kinship. A general principle in the Hanafi madhhab is that lustful touching establishes the prohibition of marriage (i.e., the man is forbidden to marry the woman’s female descendants and ascendants, and the woman is forbidden to marry the man’s male descendants and ascendants).

I could not locate the fatwa number that you have provided, nevertheless I have provided a general ruling regarding what establishes the Hurmat al-Musaharah. A mother is considered haram for the son to have sexual relations with. Nevertheless, the arousal towards her (even if one-sided) accompanied with a growing desire/lust is the very factor which establishes the Hurmat al-Musaharah.

If desire (shahwah) is accompanied by an erection which had already existed and did not increase upon touching, and did not occur after touching, then the Hurmat al-Musaharah is not established. In this case, the relationship between the parents (i.e., husband and wife) is therefore unaffected. [1]

Thus, if the erection was there as it naturally occurs and if there was no increase in desire after the touch, then you can rest assured that Hurmat al-Musaharah was not established. Doubts are whispers from the Shaytan and should be resisted.

Only Allah (عز و جل) knows best.
Written by Aalimah Saleha Bukhari Islam
Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham

[1]  وَحَدُّ الشَّهْوَةِ فِي الرَّجُلِ أَنْ تَنْتَشِرَ آلَتُهُ أَوْ تَزْدَادَ انْتِشَارًا إنْ كَانَتْ مُنْتَشِرَةً، كَذَا فِي التَّبْيِينِ. وَهُوَ الصَّحِيحُ، كَذَا فِي جَوَاهِرِ الْأَخْلَاطِيِّ. وَبِهِ يُفْتَى، كَذَا فِي الْخُلَاصَةِ. فَمَنْ انْتَشَرَتْ آلَتُهُ فَطَلَبَ امْرَأَتَهُ وَأَوْلَجَهَا بَيْنَ فَخِذَيْ ابْنَتِهَا لَا تَحْرُمُ عَلَيْهِ أُمُّهَا مَا لَمْ تَزْدَدْ انْتِشَارًا، كَذَا فِي التَّبْيِينِ. هَذَا الْحَدُّ إذَا كَانَ شَابًّا قَادِرًا عَلَى الْجِمَاعِ فَإِنْ كَانَ شَيْخًا أَوْ عِنِّينًا فَحَدُّ الشَّهْوَةِ أَنْ يَتَحَرَّكَ قَلْبُهُ بِالِاشْتِهَاءِ إنْ لَمْ يَكُنْ مُتَحَرِّكًا قَبْلَ ذَلِكَ وَيَزْدَادُ الِاشْتِهَاءُ إنْ كَانَ مُتَحَرِّكًا، كَذَا فِي الْمُحِيطِ

ص275 – كتاب الفتاوى العالمكيرية الفتاوى الهندية – القسم الثاني المحرمات بالصهرية – المكتبة الشاملة

وَالْمَسُّ بِشَهْوَةٍ كَالْجِمَاعِ لِمَا رَوَيْنَا وَلِأَنَّهُ يُفْضِي إلَى الْجِمَاعِ فَأُقِيمَ مَقَامَهُ، وَإِنْ كَانَ بَيْنَهُمَا حَائِلٌ فَإِنْ وَصَلَ حَرَارَةُ الْبَدَنِ إلَى يَدِهِ تَثْبُتُ الْحُرْمَةُ، وَإِلَّا فَلَا، وَقِيلَ: إنْ وَجَدَ الْحَجْمَ تَثْبُتُ، وَفِي مَسِّ الشَّعْرِ رِوَايَتَانِ، وَلَا فَرْقَ بَيْنَ أَنْ يَكُونَ الْمَسُّ عَمْدًا أَوْ خَطَأً أَوْ نِسْيَانًا أَوْ مُكْرَهًا وَالْمُعْتَبَرُ فِي النَّظَرِ أَنْ يَنْظُرَ إلَى الْفَرْجِ الدَّاخِلِ وَلَا يَتَحَقَّقُ ذَلِكَ إلَّا إذَا كَانَتْ مُتَّكِئَةً حَكَاهُ السَّرَخْسِيُّ وَقَالَ أَبُو يُوسُفَ: النَّظَرُ إلَى مَنَابِتِ الشَّعْرِ يَكْفِي لِثُبُوتِ حُرْمَةِ الْمُصَاهَرَةِ وَقَالَ مُحَمَّدٌ: لَا تَثْبُتُ حَتَّى يَنْظُرَ إلَى الشِّقِّ، وَالشَّهْوَةُ تُعْتَبَرُ عِنْدَ الْمَسِّ وَالنَّظَرِ حَتَّى لَوْ وُجِدَا بِغَيْرِ شَهْوَةٍ ثُمَّ اشْتَهَى بَعْدَ التَّرْكِ لَا تَتَعَلَّقُ بِهِ الْحُرْمَةُ، وَحَدُّ الشَّهْوَةِ أَنْ تَنْتَشِرَ آلَتُهُ أَوْ تَزْدَادَ انْتِشَارًا إنْ كَانَتْ مُنْتَشِرَةً حَتَّى قِيلَ إنَّ مَنْ انْتَشَرَتْ آلَتُهُ وَطَلَبَ امْرَأَتَهُ وَأَوْلَجَهَا بَيْنَ فَخِذَيْ ابْنَتِهَا لَا تَحْرُمُ عَلَيْهِ أُمُّهَا مَا لَمْ تَزْدَدْ انْتِشَارًا وَوُجُودُ الشَّهْوَةِ مِنْ أَحَدِهِمَا يَكْفِي

ص107 – كتاب تبيين الحقائق شرح كنز الدقائق وحاشية الشلبي – فصل في المحرمات – المكتبة الشاملة