Fatwa ID: 06425

 

Answered by: Alimah Zakiratul Hoque

 

Question:

 

I left my marital home with my husband due to a lot of interference from his family who never accepted me as his wife we did have our own house and lived separately however the environment was not good for me mentally and was causing me a lot of harm mentally and physically and I decided to leave after no support from him or solutions and I understand this was also hard on him.

 

I am currently living alone with my son from my previous marriage and work and financially providing for myself and my son which is a struggle while he’s staying at his house. After reconciliation, we decided that I will continue on my own and need a break after so much toxicity and this will help me recover inshallah. However, being in different towns can be difficult and this is temporary until we decide what to do.

 

He is ok with me being alone but won’t help financially even though I had a valid reason to leave due to his family and baggage which caused my breakdown. Even when we were married I paid most of the bills. My dilemma is now that we are working on our marriage and we both want it to work but living separately of my own choice I am not sure what our responsibilities are now. From an Islamic point should he help me financially? Do I have to still be intimate with him when he wants? I find this really confusing from an Islamic point of view any suggestions inshallah would be so helpful.

 

So much has happened and I would have never left but I felt I had to choose between my health or continuing living in constant misery due to his family and baggage prior to this marriage I was living a good life and now I am trying to get on with life and work on my marriage.

 

 

 

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

 

Answer:

 

Regarding expenses:

 

نفقة المرأة واجبةعلي زوجها … و إذا سلمت نفسها إليه في منزله فعليه نفقها و سكنها و كسوتها … و في المبسوط قال: تجب نفقتها و إن لم تنتقل إلي بيت زوجها

 

“A woman’s maintenance is obligatory for her husband… and if she surrenders herself to him in his house, then he must provide for her and give her housing and clothing…and it is written in Mabsoot that he must pay the expenses even if she does not move into her husband’s house” (Mukhtarat Al Nawazil, Vol 2, Pg 191)

 

Therefore, ideally, he should help you with your expenses, especially considering he agreed to live separately.

 

 

Regarding being intimate:

 

للزوج أن يطالبها بالوطء متى شاء إلّا عند اعتراضأسباب مانعة من من الوطء كالحيض و النفاس و الظهار و الإحرام و غير ذلك

 

“The husband has the right to ask her to have intercourse whenever he wants, unless there are objectionable reasons that prevent one from having intercourse, such as menstruation, postpartum bleeding, Zihaar, Ihram, and so on.” (Badai al Sanai, Vol 3, Pg 592)

 

 

 

Only Allah knows best.

Written by Alimah Zakiratul Hoque

Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah

Darul Ifta Birmingham