Fatwa ID: 08739
Answered by: Alimah Maryam Badshah
Question:
Regarding the practice of hurmat-e-musaharat, it is stated in “Fatawa Alamgiri”: “A man intends to pick up his wife for intercourse but by mistake his hand falls on his eligible daughter and he pinches her with sexual arousal, thinking that she is his wife, then his wife becomes permanently forbidden to that man. (Fatawa Alamgiri – 1/274 page)”
That is, the girl is being touched, but he was not lustful towards his daughter, but towards his wife, yet he is being told that his wife is haram.
But the fatwa on this website states, ” When in Rad Al-Muhtar, Vol. 3, p. 33 (comprehensive version)
It is required that lust be felt on her and not on anyone else, because in al-Fayd, if he looked at his daughter’s vagina without lust and desired a slave girl like her, and lust fell on the girl, the prohibition is established. But if it fell on the one he desired, then it is not.
That is, the person being touched must have a desire for her. Because it is narrated that if someone looks at his daughter’s private parts without a desire for her, and in his imagination he wants another woman as his companion, but immediately his desire for her awakens, then he will be considered to be a slave to the woman (i.e. his wife will become haram for him). However, if his desire is only for the imaginary woman, then he will not be considered to be a slave to the woman. Fatawa-e-Shaami-3/33 (Shameela)
“The woman who is to be touched, or is to be touched, must have sexual desire for her. If there is no sexual desire for her, then the hurmat will not be proven. So, if the boy does not have sexual desire for his mother in the situation described in the question, then the hurmat will not be proven as musaharah.”
- In this case, do the current Hanafi Darul Ifta give priority to the second opinion? Do they ignore the first opinion? Is there any disagreement among Hanafis on this?
- Since learning about hurmat-e-musaharat, my relationship with my mother-in-law has become very distant. Now I have to spend more time with them than with non-mahram women. It has happened with both my mother and mother-in-law that for some reason they hold my hand and I think about hurmat-e-musaharat, and immediately I feel a strange feeling in my lower abdomen and penis area, it moves slightly. However, I have no desire for them or sexual intercourse, before that I did not have such a feeling, I have spent so much time with my mother, now I have to stay away. My question is, if they hold my hand without any desire for sexual intercourse and their penis moves without any desire for sexual intercourse, is it considered hurmat-e-musaharat?
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
Answer:
For a man, Hurmat-e-Musaharah occurs when he touches or looks at a woman’s vagina opening with desire. It also occurs if he touches any part of her body with desire. It does not occur by looking at any other body part with desire, nor if he has no desire when touching any other part of her body. It has been narrated that the Prophet (saw) said: “… zina of the eyes is looking, and the zina of the ears is listening and the zina of the tongue is speaking and the zina of the hand is touching and the zina of the foot is walking, and the heart yearns and desires and the private parts confirm that or deny it.” (Muslim)
It should be kept in mind that the purpose of the rulings of Hurmat-e-Musaharah is to establish who is forbidden from marriage due to having had intercourse (whereby a child could have been produced). Just as one would not consider themselves as having committed intercouse due to solely being alone in a room with the opposite gender, one should not overthink interactions with mahrams in such a manner. As is often the case with issues regarding purity and uncertainty, overthinking or hyper focusing on matters like Hurmat-e-Musaharah can lead to one developing intrusive thoughts and unnecessary misunderstandings. Work on ignoring these thoughts and diverting your attention. If you continue to struggle with this, I advise you to speak with a trusted qualified scholar regarding this matter.
References:
وَكَذَا تَثْبُتُ بِالْوَطْءِ فِي النِّكَاحِ الْفَاسِدِ وَكَذَا بِالْوَطْءِ عَنْ شُبْهَةٍ بِالْإِجْمَاعِ، وَتَثْبُتُ بِاللَّمْسِ فِيهِمَا عَنْ شَهْوَةٍ وَبِالنَّظَرِ إلَى فَرْجِهَا عَنْ شَهْوَةٍ عِنْدَنَا وَلَا تَثْبُتُ بِالنَّظَرِ إلَى سَائِرِ الْأَعْضَاءِ بِشَهْوَةٍ وَلَا بِمَسِّ سَائِرِ الْأَعْضَاءِ إلَّا عَنْ شَهْوَةٍ بِلَا خِلَافٍ.
Badā’i’ Al-Ṣanā’i’ (Vol.2, pg.260, Dār Al-Kutub Al-’Ilmiyyah)
وَالْمُبَاشَرَةُ عَنْ شَهْوَةٍ بِمَنْزِلَةِ الْقُبْلَةِ وَكَذَا الْمُعَانَقَةُ وَهَكَذَا فِي فَتَاوَى قَاضِي خَانْ. وَكَذَا لَوْ عَضَّهَا بِشَهْوَةٍ هَكَذَا فِي الْخُلَاصَةِ.
…وَلَا تَثْبُتُ بِالنَّظَرِ إلَى سَائِرِ الْأَعْضَاءِ إلَّا بِشَهْوَةٍ وَلَا بِمَسِّ سَائِرِ الْأَعْضَاءِ لَا عَنْ شَهْوَةٍ بِلَا خِلَافٍ، كَذَا فِي الْبَدَائِعِ. وَالْمُعْتَبَرُ النَّظَرُ إلَى الْفَرْجِ الدَّاخِلِ هَكَذَا فِي الْهِدَايَةِ. وَعَلَيْهِ الْفَتْوَى هَكَذَا فِي الظَّهِيرِيَّةِ وَجَوَاهِرِ الْأَخْلَاطِيِّ. قَالُوا: لَوْ نَظَرَ إلَى فَرْجِهَا وَهِيَ قَائِمَةٌ لَا تَثْبُتُ حُرْمَةُ الْمُصَاهَرَةِ، وَإِنَّمَا يَقَعُ النَّظَرُ فِي الدَّاخِلِ إذَا كَانَتْ قَاعِدَةً مُتَّكِئَةً، كَذَا فِي فَتَاوَى قَاضِي خَانْ.
Al-Fatāwa al-Hindiyyah (Vol.1, pg.274, Dār Al-Fiqr)
(قَوْلُهُ: وَلَا يَحْرُمُ النَّظَرُ) أَيْ إلَى ظَهْرِهَا وَبَطْنِهَا وَلَا إلَى الشَّعْرِ وَالصَّدْرِ بَحْرٌ أَيْ وَلَوْ بِشَهْوَةٍ بِخِلَافِ النَّظَرِ إلَى الْفَرْجِ بِشَهْوَةٍ كَمَا مَرَّ (قَوْلُهُ: لِلشَّفَقَةِ) أَفَادَ أَنَّ التَّقْبِيلَ لَا يَحْرُمُ إلَّا إذَا كَانَ عَنْ شَهْوَةٍ، وَيَنْبَغِي تَقْيِيدُهُ بِأَنْ لَا يَكُونَ عَلَى الْفَمِ لِأَنَّهُ عَلَى الْفَمِ يُوجِبُ حُرْمَةَ الْمُصَاهَرَةِ مُطْلَقًا تَأَمَّلْ…
Raddul Muhtār (Vol.3, pg.468, Dār Al-Fiqr)
حَدَّثَنَا إِسْحَاقُ بْنُ مَنْصُورٍ، أَخْبَرَنَا أَبُو هِشَامٍ الْمَخْزُومِيُّ، حَدَّثَنَا وُهَيْبٌ، حَدَّثَنَا سُهَيْلُ بْنُ أَبِي صَالِحٍ، عَنْ أَبِيهِ، عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ، عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ “ كُتِبَ عَلَى ابْنِ آدَمَ نَصِيبُهُ مِنَ الزِّنَى مُدْرِكٌ ذَلِكَ لاَ مَحَالَةَ فَالْعَيْنَانِ زِنَاهُمَا النَّظَرُ وَالأُذُنَانِ زِنَاهُمَا الاِسْتِمَاعُ وَاللِّسَانُ زِنَاهُ الْكَلاَمُ وَالْيَدُ زِنَاهَا الْبَطْشُ وَالرِّجْلُ زِنَاهَا الْخُطَا وَالْقَلْبُ يَهْوَى وَيَتَمَنَّى وَيُصَدِّقُ ذَلِكَ الْفَرْجُ وَيُكَذِّبُهُ ”.
Sahih Muslim 2657 (Bk.46, ch.5, sunnah.com), similarly Sahih Al-Bukhāri 6243 (Bk.79, ch.12, sunnah.com) & 6612 (Bk.82, ch.9, sunnah.com)
وَتَثْبُتُ حُرْمَةُ الْمُصَاهَرَةِ بِالنِّكَاحِ الصَّحِيحِ دُونَ الْفَاسِدِ، كَذَا فِي مُحِيطِ السَّرَخْسِيِّ. فَلَوْ تَزَوَّجَهَا نِكَاحًا فَاسِدًا لَا تَحْرُمُ عَلَيْهِ أُمُّهَا بِمُجَرَّدِ الْعَقْدِ بَلْ بِالْوَطْءِ هَكَذَا فِي الْبَحْرِ الرَّائِقِ. وَتَثْبُتُ بِالْوَطْءِ حَلَالًا كَانَ أَوْ عَنْ شُبْهَةٍ أَوْ زِنًا، كَذَا فِي فَتَاوَى قَاضِي خَانْ. فَمَنْ زَنَى بِامْرَأَةٍ حَرُمَتْ عَلَيْهِ أُمُّهَا وَإِنْ عَلَتْ وَابْنَتُهَا وَإِنْ سَفْلَتَ، وَكَذَا تَحْرُمُ الْمَزْنِيُّ بِهَا عَلَى آبَاءِ الزَّانِي وَأَجْدَادِهِ وَإِنْ عَلَوْا وَأَبْنَائِهِ وَإِنْ سَفَلُوا… وَكَمَا تَثْبُتُ هَذِهِ الْحُرْمَةُ بِالْوَطْءِ تَثْبُتُ بِالْمَسِّ وَالتَّقْبِيلِ وَالنَّظَرِ إلَى الْفَرْجِ بِشَهْوَةٍ، كَذَا فِي الذَّخِيرَةِ. سَوَاءٌ كَانَ بِنِكَاحٍ أَوْ مِلْكٍ أَوْ فُجُورٍ عِنْدَنَا
Al-Fatāwa al-Hindiyyah (Vol.1, pg.274, Dār Al-Fiqr)
Only Allah (عز و جل) knows best.
Written by Alimah Maryam Badshah
Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham
