Fatwa ID: 05639
Answered by: Mufti Muhammad Afzal Hussain
I did istikhara today. I offered two nafl and recited dua of istikhara and then slept after talking to my friend. I couldn’t sleep properly as I was waking up about every 1 or 2 hours and then I finally woke up at 4.30 am. I didn’t have any dreams but when you woke up I had a strong feeling that I should marry the guy I want and should say no to my parents for the person whom they want me to marry. Now, what should I do?
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
Firstly, there is no evidence in the Quran or Hadith to suggest a direct link between praying Istikhara and what comes in a dream after making Istikhara. To make an Istikhara does not mean that a person abandons all other necessary enquiries. A person must carry out all efforts necessary to reach a correct decision even after offering Istikhara Prayer.
Secondly, Istikhara prayer should be offered with an open mind, not when you have already made a decision, tempted with it/ inclined to it or something already that has prevailed in your mind, and are simply looking for evidence to support your matter. Otherwise, this is not truly seeking guidance from Allah as you are only waiting for a sign to support your own decision and likings.
Finally, Abu Darda (May Allah be pleased with him) said, the Messenger of Allah admonished me with regards to nine things. One of them is “obey your parents, even if they command you to leave your worldly processions then leave it for their sake.” (Al-Adab al-mufrad:18, chapter: Disobedience to Parents). Prophet (Peace be upon Him) also said, “Shall I tell you which is the worst of the major sins? He repeated that three times. They replied, yes Messenger of Allah. He said, associating something else with Allah and disobeying his parents. He had been reclining, but then he sat up and said, Beware of lying.” [Al-Adab al-Mufrad: 15, Chapter: Disobedience to Parents]
Allama Yousuf Ludhyanwi said, “it is children’s duty to prioritize their parent’s decision over their own because of their experience, wisdom, foresightedness, kindness and love towards their children. [Aapke Masail Aur Un Ka Hal, vol: 2, page: 87 and 88, publisher: Bangladesh Islamic Centre Dhaka]
So, you consult with your parents, obey them and remember, the prophet did not allow a man’s pledge to do Hijrah (emigration) because he did not have consent from his parents. [see: Al-Adab Al-Mufrad: 13, Chapter: On Repaying Parents]
Only Allah Knows Best
Written by Mufti Muhammad Afzal Hussain
Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham