Fatwa ID: 08251

Answered by Alimah Shireen Mangera-Badat

Question:
Me and my husband have been having problems. He had become short-tempered and used to lose control—this happened many times and in extreme anger wouldn’t believe what I would say. This is something that started happening every few weeks over the smallest things. I told him a few times it’s not normal—even our children would say that it’s like he has some mental issues—because he would even stop speaking to the kids every time he was in that mood. But when he was normal, it was like a different person—very caring and loving.

Recently we had a dispute and he stopped talking to me. During that time, I went through my menstruation. On the fifth day after ghusl, we sat and cleared our differences. He asked if I could read the Kalimah and promise to live with him with my heart. After that, twice we had the husband-wife relationship, and I was still in the need of ghusl. But over something very small and petty, he lost his temper and said talaq three times in one sitting. This happened a week ago. Even on that day, he was ok in the morning.

I’m not sure if there’s any chance of reconciling or not. Please can you guide me with this?

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيْم
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

Answer:
Divorce is one of the issues that one should not utter in anger or jest.

You have mentioned that you feel that your husband has mental health issues, but you have not mentioned that it is a diagnosed condition. Therefore, in your case, as it is not a diagnosed condition, your husband’s words of divorce are quite clear. [1]

He spoke words of divorce and no other words after that. In clear words—in Fiqh terminology this is classed as sareeh (clear words/unambiguous)—which would mean that his words are effective. All three divorces have taken place. [2] [3]

In your given situation, this would also mean that no reconciliation is possible unless halala was performed. This process must occur naturally and cannot be arranged deceitfully, as halalah completed with the intent of returning to the first husband is impermissible (haram).

I hope that this answers the question.

Only Allah knows best.

Written by:
Alimah Shireen Mangera-Badat

Checked and approved by:
Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham

[1] قوله : (صريح) هو ما لا يستعمل إلا في حل عقدة النكاح، سواء كان الواقع به رجعياً أو بائناً كما سيأتي بيانه في الباب الآتي. قوله : وملحق به أي من حيث عدم احتياجه إلى النية كلفظ التحريم أو من حيث وقوع الرجعي به وإن احتاج إلى نية : كاعتدي، واستبرئي رحمك، وأنت واحدة. أفاده

الرحمتي. قوله : (وكناية) هي ما لم يوضع للطلاق واحتمله وغيره كما سيأتي في بابه. قوله: (ومحله المنكوحة) أي ولو معتدة عن طلاق رجعي أو بائن غير ثلاث في حرة وثنتين في أمة أو عن نسخ بتفريق لإباء أحدهما عن الإسلام أو بارتداد أحدهما

رد المختار، ص٤٣١، v ٤

[2] وفي الخانية قال لزوجته أنت طالق وسكت ثم قال ثلاثاً، وإن كان سكوته لانقطاع النفس تطلق ثلاثاً

رد المختار، ص ٦٢٤، v ٤

[3] وفي أنت الطلاق) أو طلاق (أو أنت طالق الطلاق أو أنت طالق طلاقاً، يقع واحدة رجعية إن لم ينو شيئاً أو نوى) يعني بالصدر، لأنه لو نوى بطائق واحدة وبالطلاق أخرى وقعتا رجعيتين لو مدخولاً بها كقوله : أنت طالق أنت طالق. زيلعي (واحدة أو ثنتين لأنه صريح مصدر لا يحتمل العدد (فإن نوى ثلاثاً فثلاث

رد المختار، ص ٤٦٣،   ,v ٤