Fatwa ID: 06290

 

Answered by: Maulana Yūsuf Badāt

 

Question:

 

If a person is married for two years but the wife is not ready to have intercourse with her husband. Both husband and wife satisfy each other’s needs in other ways. The wife is not willing to talk about the issue openly and rather behaves rudely about the subject when it is brought up. Is a husband selfish about wanting intercourse in this situation?

 

Can a husband divorce his wife and marry another woman in this situation?

 

Can the husband tell a third person, probably an elder to solve this situation?

 

 

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

 

Answer:

 

Islamically both partners in the marriage have a right to enjoy sexual intimacy. Intercourse is an important part of marriage. If it is not happening, the couple should address and work together to facilitate it. An appropriate marriage therapist or counsellor may also assist. It is not selfish for a spouse to seek sexual needs from their lawful partner.

 

Both husband and wife require emotional connection, kind treatment, safety, respect, love and loyalty. When this is present, it easily formulates closeness, bonds and sexual intercourse.

 

If after attempting all possible avenues, a spouse is still not ready for intercourse while the other wants sexual intimacy, divorce is permissible.

 

The great contemporary jurist, Shaykh Muftī Khālid Saifullāh Al Rahmāni (may Allāh preserve him) writes:

 

“If the desire to have intercourse is not fulfilled, there is a potential danger for abundant evil, severe immorality and indecency, especially in the modern era we live in, an era of much temptation and indecency. The rights that are mandatory through marriage are inclusive of both the husband and wife. A spouse will have the right to separate seeking divorce if sexual intercourse does not take place at least once in four to six months”. – (See: Fiqh Al Ḥalāl Wal Ḥarām by Mufti Khālid Saifullāh Al-Raḥmānī, Page 270, Muassasah Īfā Li-ṭab wa-nashr)

 

 

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “If a woman spends the night deserting her husband’s bed [does not sleep with him], then the angels send their curses on her until she returns back [to her husband].” – (Ṣaḥīḥ Bukhārī 5194)¹

 

 

 

Only Allāh knows best

Written by Maulana Yūsuf Badāt

Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah

Darul Ifta Birmingham

 

 

 

 

1 إِذَا بَاتَتِ الْمَرْأَةُ مُهَاجِرَةً فِرَاشَ زَوْجِهَا لَعَنَتْهَا الْمَلاَئِكَةُ حَتَّى تَرْجِعَ – رواه البخاري ٥١٩٤