{"id":23613,"date":"2022-01-11T18:49:00","date_gmt":"2022-01-11T18:49:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/?p=23613"},"modified":"2022-01-11T18:51:52","modified_gmt":"2022-01-11T18:51:52","slug":"living-arrangements-in-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/living-arrangements-in-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"Living Arrangements in Marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"

Fatwa ID: 05740<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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Answered by: Maulana Burhaan Rahman<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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Question:<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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I have left my marital home with my husband due to a lot of interference from his family who never accepted me as his wife we did have our own house and lived separate however the environment was not good for me mentally and was causing me a lot of harm mentally and physically and I decided to leave after no support from him or solutions and I understand this was also hard on him.<\/span><\/p>\n

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I am currently living alone with my son from my previous marriage and work and financially providing for myself and my son which is a struggle while he\u2019s staying at his house. After reconciliation, we decided that I will continue on my own and need a break after so much toxicity and this will help me recover inshallah. However, being in different towns can be difficult and this is temporary until we decide what to do.<\/span><\/p>\n

He is ok with me being alone but won\u2019t help financially even though I had a valid reason to leave due to his family and baggage which caused my breakdown. Even when we were married I paid most of the bills. My dilemma is now that we are working on our marriage and we both want it to work but living separately of my own choice I am not sure what our responsibilities are now? <\/span><\/p>\n

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From an Islamic point should he help me financially? Do I have to still be intimate with him when he wants? I find this really confusing from an Islamic point of view any suggestions Inshaa Allah would be so helpful.<\/span><\/p>\n

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So much has happened and I would have never left but I felt I had to choose between my health or continue living in constant misery due to his family and baggage prior to this marriage I was living a good life and now I am trying to get on with life and work on my marriage.<\/span><\/p>\n

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In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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Answer:<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

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One of the most important rights that a wife has is that her husband spends on her, which is deemed to be a great good action that he can do which will bring him closer to Allah. <\/span><\/p>\n

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T<\/span>his spending covers the: <\/span><\/span>
\n\u2981 Food\/drink<\/span>
\n\u2981 Housing (bills, resources for home etc.),<\/span>
\n\u2981 Clothes <\/span>
\n\u2981 The wife\u2019s needs for her sustenance\/good health.<\/span><\/p>\n

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There are various Hadeeths where it shows that the husband has a duty to finance the wife.<\/span><\/p>\n

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Our beloved Prophet (SAW) has mentioned:<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u0641\u064e\u0627\u062a\u0651\u064e\u0642\u064f\u0648\u0627 \u0627\u0644\u0644\u0651\u064e\u0647\u064e \u0641\u0650\u064a \u0627\u0644\u0646\u0651\u0650\u0633\u064e\u0627\u0621\u0650 \u0641\u064e\u0625\u0650\u0646\u0651\u064e\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u0623\u064e\u062e\u064e\u0630\u0652\u062a\u064f\u0645\u064f\u0648\u0647\u064f\u0646\u0651\u064e \u0628\u0650\u0623\u064e\u0645\u064e\u0627\u0646\u0650 \u0627\u0644\u0644\u0651\u064e\u0647\u0650\u2026 \u0648\u064e\u0644\u064e\u0647\u064f\u0646\u0651\u064e \u0639\u064e\u0644\u064e\u064a\u0652\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u0631\u0650\u0632\u0652\u0642\u064f\u0647\u064f\u0646\u0651\u064e \u0648\u064e\u0643\u0650\u0633\u0652\u0648\u064e\u062a\u064f\u0647\u064f\u0646\u0651\u064e \u0628\u0650\u0627\u0644\u0652\u0645\u064e\u0639\u0652\u0631\u064f\u0648\u0641<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cFear Allah regarding women\u2026verily, you have taken them as a trust from Allah. Their rights over you are that you provide for them and clothe them in a reasonable manner.\u201d [Muslim Hadeeth no: 1218]<\/span><\/p>\n

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So it is obligatory for the husband to spend on the wife\u2019s necessities and more<\/span><\/p>\n

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It mentions in Al Binayah<\/span><\/p>\n

\u062d\u0642 \u0627\u0644\u0646\u0641\u0642\u0627\u062a: \u0648\u0647\u0648 \u062d\u0642 \u0644\u0644\u0632\u0648\u062c\u0629 \u0639\u0644\u0649 \u0627\u0644\u0632\u0648\u062c\u060c \u0641\u0639\u0644\u064a\u0647 \u0623\u0646 \u064a\u0637\u0639\u0645\u0647\u0627 \u0648\u064a\u0643\u0633\u0648\u0647\u0627 \u0628\u0627\u0644\u0645\u0639\u0631\u0648\u0641<\/span>
\n\u062d\u0642 \u0627\u0644\u0646\u0633\u0627\u0621 \u0641\u064a \u0627\u0644\u0646\u0641\u0642\u0629 \u0645\u0646 \u0627\u0644\u062d\u0642\u0648\u0642 \u0627\u0644\u0648\u0627\u062c\u0628\u0629 \u0648\u0627\u0644\u0644\u0627\u0632\u0645\u0629\u060c\u00a0\u0648\u0644\u0630\u0644\u0643 \u062b\u0628\u062a \u0641\u064a \u0627\u0644\u062d\u062f\u064a\u062b \u0627\u0644\u0635\u062d\u064a\u062d \u0639\u0646 \u0627\u0644\u0646\u0628\u064a \u0635\u0644\u0649 \u0627\u0644\u0644\u0647 \u0639\u0644\u064a\u0647 \u0648\u0633\u0644\u0645 \u0623\u0646\u0647 \u0627\u0634\u062a\u0643\u062a \u0644\u0647 \u0647\u0646\u062f \u0641\u0642\u0627\u0644\u062a <\/span>
\n“\u064a\u0627 \u0631\u0633\u0648\u0644 \u0627\u0644\u0644\u0647! \u0625\u0646 \u0623\u0628\u0627 \u0633\u0641\u064a\u0627\u0646 \u0631\u062c\u0644 \u0634\u062d\u064a\u062d \u0645\u0633\u064a\u0643\u060c \u0623\u0641\u0622\u062e\u0630 \u0645\u0646 \u0645\u0627\u0644\u0647 \u0644\u0648\u0644\u062f\u064a\u061f” \u0641\u0642\u0627\u0644 “\u062e\u0630\u064a \u0645\u0646 \u0645\u0627\u0644\u0647 \u0645\u0627 \u064a\u0643\u0641\u064a\u0643\u0650 \u0648\u0648\u0644\u062f\u0643 \u0628\u0627\u0644\u0645\u0639\u0631\u0648\u0641”.<\/span><\/p>\n

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It is the right of the wife to be spent on by the husband, to feed her and clothe her. The right of the woman in terms of spending (from the husband) is obligatory and it\u2019s a necessity. That\u2019s the reason why it is mentioned in an authentic narration when hind (RA) complained to the prophet, \u201coh messenger of Allah, my husband (Abu Sufyan) is being stingy (with wealth), can I take money from him for my son?\u201d the messenger (SAW) replied, \u201ctake however much money you need for yourself and for your son\u201d. [Al Binayah vol 2 page 40]<\/span><\/p>\n

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So the husband must be spending for the wife\/children\/household etc. and it is a sin if he withholds for no reason.<\/span><\/p>\n

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The husband has the right to accept who comes in and out of the house.<\/span><\/p>\n

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Our beloved prophet (SAW) has mentioned in another Hadeeth:<\/span><\/p>\n

\u200f “\u0623\u064e\u0644\u0627\u064e \u0648\u064e\u0627\u0633\u0652\u062a\u064e\u0648\u0652\u0635\u064f\u0648\u0627 \u0628\u0650\u0627\u0644\u0646\u0651\u0650\u0633\u064e\u0627\u0621\u0650 \u062e\u064e\u064a\u0652\u0631\u064b\u0627 \u0641\u064e\u0625\u0650\u0646\u0651\u064e\u0645\u064e\u0627 \u0647\u064f\u0646\u0651\u064e \u0639\u064e\u0648\u064e\u0627\u0646\u064c \u0639\u0650\u0646\u0652\u062f\u064e\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u0644\u064e\u064a\u0652\u0633\u064e \u062a\u064e\u0645\u0652\u0644\u0650\u0643\u064f\u0648\u0646\u064e \u0645\u0650\u0646\u0652\u0647\u064f\u0646\u0651\u064e \u0634\u064e\u064a\u0652\u0626\u064b\u0627 \u063a\u064e\u064a\u0652\u0631\u064e \u0630\u064e\u0644\u0650\u0643\u064e … \u0623\u064e\u0644\u0627\u064e \u0625\u0650\u0646\u0651\u064e \u0644\u064e\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u0639\u064e\u0644\u064e\u0649 \u0646\u0650\u0633\u064e\u0627\u0626\u0650\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u062d\u064e\u0642\u0651\u064b\u0627 \u0648\u064e\u0644\u0650\u0646\u0650\u0633\u064e\u0627\u0626\u0650\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u0639\u064e\u0644\u064e\u064a\u0652\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u062d\u064e\u0642\u0651\u064b\u0627 \u0641\u064e\u0623\u064e\u0645\u0651\u064e\u0627 \u062d\u064e\u0642\u0651\u064f\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u0639\u064e\u0644\u064e\u0649 \u0646\u0650\u0633\u064e\u0627\u0626\u0650\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u0623\u064e\u0644\u0627\u0651\u064e \u064a\u064f\u0648\u0637\u0650\u0626\u0652\u0646\u064e \u0641\u064f\u0631\u064f\u0634\u064e\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u0645\u064e\u0646\u0652 \u062a\u064e\u0643\u0652\u0631\u064e\u0647\u064f\u0648\u0646\u064e \u0648\u064e\u0644\u0627\u064e \u064a\u064e\u0623\u0652\u0630\u064e\u0646\u0651\u064e \u0641\u0650\u064a \u0628\u064f\u064a\u064f\u0648\u062a\u0650\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u0644\u0650\u0645\u064e\u0646\u0652 \u062a\u064e\u0643\u0652\u0631\u064e\u0647\u064f\u0648\u0646\u064e \u0623\u064e\u0644\u0627\u064e \u0648\u064e\u062d\u064e\u0642\u0651\u064f\u0647\u064f\u0646\u0651\u064e \u0639\u064e\u0644\u064e\u064a\u0652\u0643\u064f\u0645\u0652 \u0623\u064e\u0646\u0652 \u062a\u064f\u062d\u0652\u0633\u0650\u0646\u064f\u0648\u0627 \u0625\u0650\u0644\u064e\u064a\u0652\u0647\u0650\u0646\u0651\u064e \u0641\u0650\u064a \u0643\u0650\u0633\u0652\u0648\u064e\u062a\u0650\u0647\u0650\u0646\u0651\u064e \u0648\u064e\u0637\u064e\u0639\u064e\u0627\u0645\u0650\u0647\u0650\u0646\u0651\u064e “\u200f<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cTake good care of women, for they are your prisoners and you have no rights over them beyond that\u2026You have rights over your women and your women have rights over you. Your rights over your women are that they should not allow anyone to sit on your beds whom you dislike, or allow anyone to enter your houses who you dislike, and their rights over you are that you should clothe and feed them properly.\u201d [Tirmidhi hadeeth no: 1163]<\/span><\/p>\n

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And with regards to the permission of sexual relations. It is not permissible for the woman to refuse to go to bed with her husband without a valid excuse such as menses, sickness or an obligation such as fasting, Hajj etc. If she does that then she has sinned.<\/span><\/p>\n

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Our beloved prophet (SAW) says:<\/span><\/p>\n

\u0625\u0630\u0627 \u062f\u0639\u0627 \u0627\u0644\u0631\u062c\u0644 \u0632\u0648\u062c\u062a\u0647 \u0644\u062d\u0627\u062c\u062a\u0647 \u0641\u064e\u0644\u0652\u062a\u064e\u0623\u062a\u0650\u0647\u0650 \u0648\u0625\u0646 \u0643\u0627\u0646\u062a \u0639\u0644\u0649 \u0627\u0644\u062a\u0651\u064e\u0646\u064f\u0648\u0631<\/span><\/p>\n

“If a man calls his wife to fulfil his desire, she should come to him even if she is busy with the oven.” [Bukhaari Hadeeth no: 2998]\u00a0<\/span>
\nThis means, when a man calls his wife to fulfil his sexual desire, she should immediately respond to him, even if she is busy doing something that none but her can do, such as baking or cooking.<\/span><\/p>\n

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May Allah SWT keep everyone steadfast and fix our problems in all aspects of our life. Ameen<\/span><\/p>\n

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Only Allah knows best.<\/span><\/p>\n

Written by Maulana Burhaan Rahman<\/span><\/p>\n

Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah<\/span><\/p>\n

Darul Ifta Birmingham<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Fatwa ID: 05740   Answered by: Maulana Burhaan Rahman   Question:   I have left my marital home with my husband due to a lot…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[11],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23613"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=23613"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23613\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":23673,"href":"https:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/23613\/revisions\/23673"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=23613"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=23613"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/daruliftabirmingham.co.uk\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=23613"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}