Conceiving a child

CategoriesMarriage [574]

Salaam I have wanted to have a baby for so long but my husband does not.  He has been forcing me to take contraception and I do not want to anymore. We are both working so money is coming in and if I had to I could support the baby by myself.  When I talk to him about it he gets angry and he does not talk to me.  I can not carry on, I really want a baby.  Would it be allowed for me to decive my husband by not taking the contraception, in order to have a baby.   Jazaa’kAllahu khair 

In the name of Allah, the most Beneficent, the most Merciful.

Answer

Islam encourages reproduction in large numbers with the sole aim of increasing the size of the Ummah.

The Prophet of Allah Sallallahu Alahi Wasalam has said: “Marry women who are loving and reproduce in abundance, for I shall out number the other nations by you.” (Mishkat P267)

The fuqaha (jurists) have said that to practice temporary reversible contraception like the withdrawal method, the pill, using condoms etc…is somewhat disliked (makruh tanzihi) without any reason. If there is a genuine reason, then it will be permissible with the permission of the wife. (See Sunan Ibn Majah p.138)

Some of the reasons are:

1        Physical state of the women like repeated pregnancies have an effect on her health.

2        Spacing out children in order to give them adequate care and attention. (Jadeed Fiqhi Masaail P 289 v1)

If contraception is practiced for the following reasons then this will not be permissible:

1        Fear of poverty

Allah (Swt) has said in the Holy Qur’an: “And do not kill your children for fear of poverty.” (Surah Bani Israeel v31)

2        For the fashion of keeping small families and imitating the disbelivers.

The Prophet of Allah Sallallahu Alahi Wasalam has said: “He who imitates any group of people is from them.” (Sunan Abu Dawud P559 v2)

In regards to your question, not only having children is a right of the husband but it is also the right of the wife. Without the permission of his wife the husband cannot force his wife to take contraceptive measures. (Raddul Muhtar P334 v4)

Therefore, it will be permissible for you not to take any contraceptive measures forced upon you by your husband.

Finally I would like to finish off by reminding you that such issues should be resolved by your selves with mutual understanding and putting ones needs before oneself.

Only Allah Knows Best.

Mohammed Tosir Miah

Darul Ifta Birmingham.

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