Should a husband be informed if his wife is having an affair? Or is it better to keep quiet because of the children?
Also would you please quote the source and number of the hadith or excerpt from the Quran which states whether he must be informed or not.
In the name of Allah, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful.
Allah states in the Quran, “You are the best nation which has ever been raised for the guidance of mankind. You enjoin good, forbid evil, and believe in Allah…” (Surah Al Imran: 110)
One of the main distinguishing features of this Ummah, for which they have been praised, is their sense of duty in reminding one another to perform good and refrain from sin.
Abu Sa’id al-Khudri narrates that I heard the Messenger of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) as saying: “He who amongst you sees something abominable should modify it with the help of his hand; and if he has not strength enough to do it, then he should do it with his tongue; and if he has not strength enough to do it, (even) then he should (dislike it) from his heart and that is the least of faith.” (Sahih Muslim: 16)
It is clear from the above Hadith the duty of a Muslim in trying to stop a sinful act and the stages therein. However at the same time one should remember the advice Allah has given us when guiding and reminding one another. Allah states in the Quran, “Call people to the Way of your Rabb with wisdom and best advice, and reason with them, if you have to, in the most courteous manner: for your Rabb knows best who strays from His Way and He knows best who is rightly guided.” (Surah An Nahl: 125)
In the above mentioned situation it is perhaps more advisable that the wife is approached first and the severity of her actions and the possible impact on her children as well as her marriage is explained. Inshallah Allah will help her see sense and give her the ability to repent from the grave sin she is indulged in.
And Allah knows best.
Darul Ifta Birmingham