Fatwa ID: 09015
Answered by Maulana Muhammad Haque
Question:
Salam,
Me and my wife had a really crazy argument, where something small led to something crazy, the argument lasted about 2/3 hours and she was just insulting my family (things to trigger me) I stayed quiet for a bit (we live with my parents as I did not want to raise attention to our room) while I was feeding my son (few months old) postpartum has taken a big effect on her but there’s so much someone can take, I had lost my senses of anger during this argument – I was insulting her families mental health history and targeted certain family members mental health and accused her bloodline of ruining my sons chances of growing up normal and saying very nasty things that I would never say with a normal headspace – I was saying things I would normally never say to a point I was carrying my son and telling him that his mom is crazy – I was truly unaware of what I was doing and saying not acting like a sane person – the anger of the things my wife were saying to me had consumed me and making me do and say things that were not in my character, during this back and forth I repeated the word talaq three times in one sitting, which my knowledge at the time I only believed to have constituted to one divorce but to be honest my brain wasn’t even functioning at that moment I don’t even remember having a second to think before speaking and saying what I did so even if I did know that three talaqs = 3 divorces I might have still said it as I had no control of what I was saying and unaware of what I was saying, it was so bad that we carried on arguing (not even acknowledging that Talaq was said) as we reconciled at the end and nobody had brought up talaq was mentioned, believe it or not we try to be practicing Muslims who pray Tahajud every night but not educated divorce-wise.
A few hours later I remembered what I had said and started googling which led me to so many opinions, and I was shocked to find out that three divorces make divorces irreversible.
To break down the following:
My state of mind:
∙ I was in a state of extreme uncontrolled anger where it had overtaken me and I was behaving like a nut job saying and doing things that were not in my character even with my young child.
∙ I was not aware of what I was saying as I said it and was in no shock or any emotion after I had said it.
∙ I had no intention of issuing a formal divorce.
∙ I believed saying talaq three times counted as one — I had no knowledge it could be irreversible.
∙ I was simultaneously saying other irrational, out of character things demonstrating I was not in a normal state of mind.
What happened after:
∙ Neither my wife nor I treated it as a divorce.
∙ We continued as husband and wife naturally.
∙ I only discovered the potential implications hours later when I searched online.
Circumstances:
∙ My wife was on her menses.
∙ She was postpartum and not her normal self.
∙ Significant emotional strain on both of us.
∙ No witnesses present.
I just want to know that under my situation would the three talaqs count as three or as one?
Or does the possibility of being in that ighlaq state cancel out the divorce and what are the next steps for us in the scenarios.
Thank you
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
Answer:
It is unfortunate that you and your wife had a turbulent argument. Muslims must control themselves at all times to save themselves from sin, disbelief, and also consequential worldly trials.
The Fuqahaa (Jurists) have categorised Talaaq given in the state of anger into three categories [1]:
Category 1: The level of anger is such that the person’s mind is sound, he is in full control of himself, and he knows what he is doing and saying. Talaq given by such a person will be valid.
Category 2: The level of anger is so extreme that the person reaches the point of temporary insanity, and they are unaware of what they are saying. Their mental thinking is distorted. Talaq by such a person will be invalid.
Category 3: The level of anger is between the above two levels of anger, where the person is extremely angry but not to the level of insanity. There is a difference of opinion regarding Talaq given in such a state, but the most correct opinion is that the Talaq will be valid.
Saying and doing things that are not your normal character does not render your anger as insanity. You stated, “I repeated the word talaq three times in one sitting, which my knowledge at the time I only believed to have constituted to one divorce” Hence, you were aware you were issuing Talaaq. You also wrote, “I had no control of what I was saying and unaware of what I was saying”; however, you wrote after that, “few hours later I remembered what I had said”. Had you been insane, you would not have yourself remembered the details of what you said.
The four ‘circumstances’ you stated in your question have no bearing on the validity of Talaaq.
The three Talaaqs you uttered are valid and will be considered as Talaaq Mughallazhah, and your marriage has ended permanently.
Your wife must sit in Iddah until three complete menstrual periods have lapsed.
Only Allah ﷻ knows best.
Written by Maulana Muhammad Haque
Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham
References:
[1]
وَلِلْحَافِظِ ابْنِ الْقَيِّمِ الْحَنْبَلِيِّ رِسَالَةٌ فِي طَلَاقِ الْغَضْبَانِ قَالَ فِيهَا: إنَّهُ عَلَى ثَلَاثَةِ أَقْسَامٍ: أَحَدُهَا أَنْ يَحْصُلَ لَهُ مَبَادِئُ الْغَضَبِ بِحَيْثُ لَا يَتَغَيَّرُ عَقْلُهُ وَيَعْلَمُ مَا يَقُولُ وَيَقْصِدُهُ، وَهَذَا لَا إشْكَالَ فِيهِ. وَالثَّانِي أَنْ يَبْلُغَ النِّهَايَةَ فَلَا يَعْلَمُ مَا يَقُولُ وَلَا يُرِيدُهُ، فَهَذَا لَا رَيْبَ أَنَّهُ لَا يَنْفُذُ شَيْءٌ مِنْ أَقْوَالِهِ. الثَّالِثُ مَنْ تَوَسَّطَ بَيْنَ الْمَرْتَبَتَيْنِ بِحَيْثُ لَمْ يَصِرْ كَالْمَجْنُونِ فَهَذَا مَحَلُّ النَّظَرِ، وَالْأَدِلَّةُ عَلَى عَدَمِ نُفُوذِ أَقْوَالِهِ.
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