Fatwa ID: 09496
Answered by Muftiyah Maryam Badshah
Question:
Assalamu alaikum,
If my wife wants to work, can I tell her to pay some of the share of bills?
Personally, I don’t see the point of her working and being out the house if she’s not going to contribute.
If she doesn’t want to contribute I would rather have her stay at home and cook or do something.
I know it’s my responsibility to pay for everything, and I have the right to have her at home, by allowing her to work I am losing out on my right, but my responsibility is the same.
Similar, if we were struggling and she had to work, it would be expected of me to help out at home to ease her responsibility.
Jazakallah ahead for the answer.
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
Answer:
Allah ﷻ says: “And from His signs is that He created for you from yourselves spouses that you may find tranquillity in them and He placed between you both love and mercy; Indeed in that are signs for a people who reflect.” Surah Ar-Rūm (30:21) [1]
In Islam, marriage is a sunnah which has been legislated for the purpose of both spouses protecting each other from immorality (zina) and attaining good deeds. It is the right of the wife that she receive her dowry and that the husband provides for her maintenance (food, clothing and finances (including a stipend)), accommodation, safety and protection (both physically and emotionally), and that she is treated in a kind and just manner. The right of the husband is that his wife guards his home and personal assets in his absence, shows obedience in matters that Allah ﷻ has commanded, guards her chastity, and that she treats him in a good and just manner. It is the right of both spouses to make themselves available for intercourse with the other. Aside from these stipulated rights, any other tasks should be discussed and distributed in a fair and amicable manner between the spouses.[2]
While there may be expectations when one’s family dynamics differ from the norm, one should keep in mind that a social expectation is not a binding right or responsibility. The duty and responsibility of providing the finances rests solely on the husband. He cannot demand or expect his wife to work for their living expenses, but rather they should be living within his means. If a husband falls short in his ability to provide for his family and is in need of finances, he can request a loan from his wife or elsewhere, or if his wife wishes she can gift him from her wealth, but she should in no way be pressured or forced to give up her private wealth or belonging. If a wife decides to assist in the matter of household finances, a husband should show appreciation for the help his wife is offering him and under no circumstances should he feel entitled to this assistance.[3]
The scholars state that outside of reasons like the husband being harmed or his rights to her are being significantly reduced by her work, there is no reason for a husband to prevent his wife from a halal occupation. If a woman wishes to have an occupation, she should work towards obtaining a job that allows her to work from home, as it is preferred for a woman to not have an occupation which causes her to leave her home. However, if she has the permission of her husband and her adherence to Islam is not compromised, she can go to work even when her needs are met. When this is the case, a woman should choose a halal occupation where she is free to wear the veil (niqab) and she is protected from being alone or in close proximity with non-mahrams. A woman should avoid an occupation where she must have unnecessary or prolonged dialogues with non-mahrams and she should ensure that her dignity is respected at all times.[4]
As you have not stated the reason why your wife wishes to work nor the details of your circumstances, I would advise that you both speak with a qualified Muslim councillor or scholar and see if they can offer some suggestions that may be of benefit to your situation.
Only Allah ﷻ knows best.
Written by Muftiyah Maryam Badshah
Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham
References:
[1]
وَمِنْ آيَاتِهِ أَنْ خَلَقَ لَكُم مِّنْ أَنفُسِكُمْ أَزْوَاجًا لِّتَسْكُنُوا إِلَيْهَا وَجَعَلَ بَيْنَكُم مَّوَدَّةً وَرَحْمَةً ۚ إِنَّ فِي ذَٰلِكَ لَآيَاتٍ لِّقَوْمٍ يَتَفَكَّرُونَ
Qur’an (30:21)
[2]
قَوْلُهُ: وَمَكْرُوهًا) أَيْ تَحْرِيمًا بَحْرٌ (قَوْلُهُ: فَإِنْ تَيَقَّنَهُ) أَيْ تَيَقَّنَ الْجَوْرَ حَرُمَ؛ لِأَنَّ النِّكَاحَ إنَّمَا شُرِعَ لِمَصْلَحَةِ تَحْصِينِ النَّفْسِ، وَتَحْصِيلِ الثَّوَابِ
Raddul Muhtar (Vol.3, pg.7, Dār Al-Fiqr)
أَقَلُّ الْمَهْرِ عَشَرَةُ دَرَاهِمَ مَضْرُوبَةً أَوْ غَيْرَ مَضْرُوبَةٍ حَتَّى يَجُوزَ وَزْنُ عَشَرَةٍ تِبْرًا، وَإِنْ كَانَتْ قِيمَتُهُ أَقَلَّ، كَذَا فِي التَّبْيِينِ وَغَيْرُ الدَّرَاهِمِ يَقُومُ مَقَامَهَا بِاعْتِبَارِ الْقِيمَةِ وَقْتَ الْعَقْدِ
Al-Fatāwa al-Hindiyyah (Vol.1, pg.302, Dār Al-Fiqr)
تَجِبُ عَلَى الرَّجُلِ نَفَقَةُ امْرَأَتِهِ
Al-Fatāwa al-Hindiyyah (Vol.1, pg.544, Dār Al-Fiqr)
يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا لَا يَحِلُّ لَكُمْ أَن تَرِثُوا النِّسَاءَ كَرْهًا ۖ وَلَا تَعْضُلُوهُنَّ لِتَذْهَبُوا بِبَعْضِ مَا آتَيْتُمُوهُنَّ إِلَّا أَن يَأْتِينَ بِفَاحِشَةٍ مُّبَيِّنَةٍ ۚ وَعَاشِرُوهُنَّ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ ۚ فَإِن كَرِهْتُمُوهُنَّ فَعَسَىٰ أَن تَكْرَهُوا شَيْئًا وَيَجْعَلَ اللَّهُ فِيهِ خَيْرًا كَثِيرًا
Qur’an (4:19)
الرِّجَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاءِ بِمَا فَضَّلَ اللَّهُ بَعْضَهُمْ عَلَىٰ بَعْضٍ وَبِمَا أَنفَقُوا مِنْ أَمْوَالِهِمْ ۚ فَالصَّالِحَاتُ قَانِتَاتٌ حَافِظَاتٌ لِّلْغَيْبِ بِمَا حَفِظَ اللَّهُ
Qur’an (4:34)
…وَمَا يَشْتَمِلُ عَلَيْهِ مِنْ الْقِيَامِ بِمَصَالِحِهِ، وَإِعْفَافِ النَّفْسِ عَنْ الْحَرَامِ وَتَرْبِيَةِ الْوَلَدِ وَنَحْوِ ذَلِكَ…
… لِأَنَّ مِنْ أَحْكَامِ النِّكَاحِ حِلِّ اسْتِمْتَاعِ كُلٍّ مِنْهُمَا بِالْآخَرِ…
Raddul Muhtar (Vol.3, pg.3-4, Dār Al-Fiqr)
[3]
قَالَ فِي الْبَحْرِ: وَاتَّفَقُوا عَلَى وُجُوبِ نَفَقَةِ الْمُوسِرِينَ إذَا كَانَا مُوسِرَيْنِ، وَعَلَى نَفَقَةِ الْمُعْسِرِينَ إذَا كَانَا مُعْسِرَيْنِ، وَإِنَّمَا الِاخْتِلَافُ فِيمَا إذَا كَانَ أَحَدُهُمَا مُوسِرًا وَالْآخَرُ مُعْسِرًا، فَعَلَى ظَاهِرِ الرِّوَايَةِ الِاعْتِبَارُ لِحَالِ الرَّجُلِ، فَإِنْ كَانَ مُوسِرًا وَهِيَ مُعْسِرَةٌ فَعَلَيْهِ نَفَقَةُ الْمُوسِرِينَ، وَفِي عَكْسِهِ نَفَقَةُ الْمُعْسِرِينَ. وَأَمَّا عَلَى الْمُفْتَى بِهِ فَتَجِبُ نَفَقَةُ الْوَسَطِ فِي الْمَسْأَلَتَيْنِ وَهُوَ فَوْقَ نَفَقَةِ الْمُعْسِرَةِ وَدُونَ نَفَقَةِ الْمُوسِرَةِ.
Raddul Muhtār (Vol.3, pg.574-5, Dār Al-Fiqr)
قَوْلُهُ بِقَدْرِ حَالِهِمَا) أَيْ فِي الْيَسَارِ وَالْإِعْسَارِ، فَلَيْسَ مَسْكَنُ الْأَغْنِيَاءِ كَمَسْكَنِ الْفُقَرَاءِ كَمَا فِي الْبَحْرِ؛ لَكِنْ إذَا كَانَ أَحَدُهُمَا غَنِيًّا وَالْآخَرُ فَقِيرًا؛ فَقَدْ مَرَّ أَنَّهُ يَجِبُ لَهَا فِي الطَّعَامِ وَالْكُسْوَةِ الْوَسَطُ، وَيُخَاطَبُ بِقَدْرِ وُسْعِهِ وَالْبَاقِي دَيْنٌ عَلَيْهِ إلَى الْمَيْسَرَةِ…
Raddul Muhtār (Vol.3, pg.600, Dār Al-Fiqr)
… وَالنَّفَقَةُ الْوَاجِبَةُ الْمَأْكُولُ وَالْمَلْبُوسُ وَالسُّكْنَى… وَيَجِبُ لَهَا مَا تُنَظِّفُ بِهِ وَتُزِيلُ الْوَسَخَ… وَعَلَيْهِ مِنْ الْمَاءِ مَا تَغْسِلُ بِهِ ثِيَابَهَا وَبَدَنَهَا مِنْ الْوَسَخِ… ثَمَنُ مَاءِ الِاغْتِسَالِ عَلَى الزَّوْجِ، وَكَذَا مَاءُ وُضُوئِهَا عَلَيْهِ غَنِيَّةً كَانَتْ أَوْ فَقِيرَةً…
Al-Fatāwa al-Hindiyyah (Vol.1, pg.548-9, Dār Al-Fiqr)
[4]
… قَوْلُهُ وَكُلِّ عَمَلٍ وَلَوْ تَبَرُّعًا لِأَجْنَبِيٍّ) كَذَا ذَكَرَهُ فِي الْبَحْرِ بَحْثًا حَيْثُ قَالَ: وَيَنْبَغِي عَدَمُ تَخْصِيصِ الْغَزْلِ، بَلْ لَهُ أَنْ يَمْنَعَهَا مِنْ الْأَعْمَالِ كُلِّهَا الْمُقْتَضِيَةِ لِلْكَسْبِ؛ لِأَنَّهَا مُسْتَغْنِيَةٌ عَنْهُ لِوُجُوبِ كِفَايَتِهَا عَلَيْهِ… وَإِنْ كَانَتْ الْعِلَّةُ اسْتِغْنَاءَهَا عَنْ الْكَسْبِ كَمَا مَرَّ، فَفِيهِ أَنَّهَا قَدْ تَحْتَاجُ إلَى مَا لَا يَلْزَمُ الزَّوْجَ شِرَاؤُهُ لَهَا، وَاَلَّذِي يَنْبَغِي تَحْرِيرُهُ أَنْ يَكُونَ لَهُ مَنْعُهَا عَنْ كُلِّ عَمَلٍ يُؤَدِّي إلَى تَنْقِيصِ حَقِّهِ أَوْ ضَرَرِهِ أَوْ إلَى خُرُوجِهَا مِنْ بَيْتِهِ أَمَّا الْعَمَلُ الَّذِي لَا ضَرَرَ لَهُ فِيهِ فَلَا وَجْهَ لِمَنْعِهَا عَنْهُ خُصُوصًا فِي حَالِ غَيْبَتِهِ مِنْ بَيْتِهِ…(قَوْلُهُ وَمِنْ مَجْلِسِ الْعِلْمِ) مَعْطُوفٌ عَلَى قَوْلِهِ مِنْ الْغَزْلِ، فَإِنْ لَمْ تَقَعْ لَهَا نَازِلَةٌ، وَأَرَادَتْ الْخُرُوجَ لِتَعَلُّمِ مَسَائِلِ الْوُضُوءِ وَالصَّلَاةِ، إنْ كَانَ الزَّوْجُ يَحْفَظُ ذَلِكَ وَيُعَلِّمُهَا لَهُ مَنْعُهَا، وَإِلَّا فَالْأَوْلَى أَنْ يَأْذَنَ لَهَا أَحْيَانَا بَحْرٌ.
… وَقَالَ قَبْلَهُ: وَحَيْثُ أَبَحْنَا لَهَا الْخُرُوجَ فَإِنَّمَا يُبَاحُ بِشَرْطِ عَدَمِ الزِّينَةِ وَتَغْيِيرِ الْهَيْئَةِ إلَى مَا يَكُونُ دَاعِيَةً لِنَظَرِ الرِّجَالِ وَالِاسْتِمَالَةِ. قَالَ اللَّهُ تَعَالَى – {وَلا تَبَرَّجْنَ تَبَرُّجَ الْجَاهِلِيَّةِ الأُولَى} [الأحزاب: ٣٣]…
Raddul Muhtār (Vol.3, pg.603-4, Dār Al-Fiqr)
وَلَا يَظُنُّ مَنْ لَا فِطْنَةَ عِنْدَهُ أَنَّا إذَا قُلْنَا صَوْتُ الْمَرْأَةِ عَوْرَةٌ أَنَّا نُرِيدُ بِذَلِكَ كَلَامَهَا، لِأَنَّ ذَلِكَ لَيْسَ بِصَحِيحٍ، فَإِذًا نُجِيزُ الْكَلَامَ مَعَ النِّسَاءِ لِلْأَجَانِبِ وَمُحَاوَرَتِهِنَّ عِنْدَ الْحَاجَةِ إلَى ذَلِكَ، وَلَا نُجِيزُ لَهُنَّ رَفْعَ أَصْوَاتِهِنَّ وَلَا تَمْطِيطَهَا وَلَا تَلْيِينَهَا وَتَقْطِيعَهَا لِمَا فِي ذَلِكَ مِنْ اسْتِمَالَةِ الرِّجَالِ إلَيْهِنَّ وَتَحْرِيكِ الشَّهَوَاتِ مِنْهُمْ
Raddul Muhtār (Vol.1, pg.406, Dār Al-Fiqr)