Fatwa ID: 09315
Answered by Mufti Abdurrahman Mohammad
Question:
Is a wife obligated to take care of her mother in law if she is living with her and her husband? In this scenario the husband did not specify before marriage that he planned on having his mother live with him and his wife. What is the Islamic viewpoint of this? Jazakumullahu Khairan
In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
Answer:
In Islam, a wife is not obligated to serve or take care of her mother-in-law, even if the mother-in-law lives in the same house. Caring for one’s parents is the husband’s duty, not the wife’s. If the wife helps, it is voluntary and an act of kindness, not a religious obligation. Allah (ﷻ) says:
For your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And honour your parents. If one or both of them reach old age in your care, never say to them ˹even˺ ‘ugh,’ nor yell at them. Rather, address them respectfully. (Al-Isra 17:23)
Allah (ﷻ) says “your parents,” which includes the parents’ sons and daughters, not sons-in-laws and daughters-in-law.
However, it is highly recommended for her to serve her mother-in-law out of her own goodwill. The Prophet (ﷺ) said:
Whoever relieves a Muslim of a burden from the burdens of the world, Allah will relieve him of a burden from the burdens of the Hereafter. (Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1425)
Whoever relieves a Muslim of a burden from the burdens of the world, Allah will relieve him of a burden from the burdens of the Hereafter. And whoever covers (the faults of) a Muslim, Allah will cover (his faults) for him in the world and the Hereafter. And Allah is engaged in helping the worshipper as long as the worshipper is engaged in helping his brother. (Jami` at-Tirmidhi 1425)
It is recommended for a wife to help her mother-in-law. However, any help a wife provides is a voluntary act of kindness, not an obligation.
Only Allah ﷻ knows best.
Written by Mufti Abdurrahman Mohammad
Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah
Darul Ifta Birmingham
References:
[1]
امْرَأَةٌ أَبَتْ أَنْ تَسْكُنَ مَعَ ضَرَّتِهَا، أَوْ مَعَ أَحْمَائِهَا كَأُمِّهِ وَغَيْرِهَا، فَإِنْ كَانَ فِي الدَّارِ بُيُوتٌ فَرَّغَ لَهَا بَيْتًا، وَجَعَلَ لِبَيْتِهَا غَلْقًا عَلَى حِدَةٍ لَيْسَ لَهَا أَنْ تَطْلُبَ مِنْ الزَّوْجِ بَيْتًا آخَرَ، فَإِنْ لَمْ يَكُنْ فِيهَا إلَّا بَيْتٌ وَاحِدٌ فَلَهَا ذَلِكَ
Al-Fatāwā Al-Hindiyyah, vol. 1, pg. 556, Al-Maṭba’ah Al-Kubrā Al-Amīriyyah
[2]
وَلَوْ جَاءَ الزَّوْجُ بِطَعَامٍ يَحْتَاجُ إلَى الطَّبْخِ وَالْخَبْزِ فَأَبَتْ الْمَرْأَةُ الطَّبْخَ وَالْخَبْزَ يَعْنِي بِأَنْ تَطْبُخَ وَتَخْبِزَ لِمَا رُوِيَ أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ ﷺ قَسَمَ الْأَعْمَالَ بَيْنَ عَلِيٍّ وَفَاطِمَةَ ﵄ فَجَعَلَ أَعْمَالَ الْخَارِجِ عَلَى عَلِيٍّ وَأَعْمَالَ الدَّاخِلِ عَلَى فَاطِمَةَ ﵄ وَلَكِنَّهَا لَا تُجْبَرُ عَلَى ذَلِكَ إنْ أَبَتْ وَيُؤْمَرُ الزَّوْجُ أَنْ يَأْتِيَ لَهَا بِطَعَامٍ مُهَيَّأٍ
Badāi’ Al-Sanāi’ Fī Tartīb Al-Sharāi’, vol. 4, pg. 24, Dār Al-Kutub Al-’Ilmiyyah