Fatwa ID: 06825

 

Answered by: Muftiyah Habiba Akhtar

 

Question:

 

My husband has never supported me financially since he was forced to marry me.

 

Since the birth of our children, he stopped giving me the little amount of money that he was forced to give by his mother. Now even though I have started working part time that money is still not enough (I work 10 hrs a week). I have asked him for money but he refuses to give me any. He gets roughly over £2000 a month.

 

He hides money in a shirt, which I found today.

 

My question is am I allowed to take some money from him without his knowledge or like I think it’s not allowed and classed as stealing?

 

All the family have spoken to him but he is stubborn and will refuse to help me or even his children (if it means my life is easy then he won’t).

 

 

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

 

Answer:

 

A marriage is a means of security for spouses. Both Husbands and wives have rights over each other and these must be fulfilled.

 

Allah SWT mentions regarding the rights of a man:

“Men are in charge of women by right of what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend for maintenance from their wealth” (1)

 

Men have been created as the stronger gender and have been given the role of guardianship.

 

What it refers to is spending on the wives to cover the expenses for their basic necessities like a home or food and clothing. This doesn’t have to refer to indulging the spouse because not all are capable of that.

 

Of course, husbands have rights that wives must fulfil that are different.

 

“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them” (2)

 

Such rights are to fulfil their needs and to respect and obey them.

 

As mentioned, the right of the wife is to be compensated for their necessities and not any luxuries. Your query makes it apparent that your husband is depriving yourself and your children of some necessities.

 

This scenario can be understood from and learnt from the incident of Hind RA.

 

Narrated ‘Aishah:

Hind came to the Prophet (ﷺ) and said: Messenger of Allah, Abu Sufyan is a stingy person. Is there any harm to me if I spend on his dependents from his property without his permission? The Prophet (ﷺ) replied: There is no harm to you if you spend according to the custom. (3)

 

Thus, in response to your query, we can establish that a wife can take from her husband’s wealth but only what is the custom and this refers to the necessities.

 

Anything beyond basic needs will be taken without right which will result in deception.

 

 

Only Allah knows best

Written by Muftiyah Habiba Akhtar

Checked and approved by Mufti Mohammed Tosir Miah

Darul Ifta Birmingham

 

 

 

 

 

(1)

(ٱلرِّجَالُ قَوَّ ٰ⁠مُونَ عَلَى ٱلنِّسَاۤءِ بِمَا فَضَّلَ ٱللَّهُ بَعۡضَهُمۡ عَلَىٰ بَعۡضࣲ وَبِمَاۤ أَنفَقُوا۟ مِنۡ أَمۡوَ ٰ⁠لِهِمۡۚ فَٱلصَّـٰلِحَـٰتُ قَـٰنِتَـٰتٌ حَـٰفِظَـٰتࣱ لِّلۡغَیۡبِ بِمَا حَفِظَ ٱللَّهُۚ وَٱلَّـٰتِی تَخَافُونَ نُشُوزَهُنَّ فَعِظُوهُنَّ وَٱهۡجُرُوهُنَّ فِی ٱلۡمَضَاجِعِ وَٱضۡرِبُوهُنَّۖ فَإِنۡ أَطَعۡنَكُمۡ فَلَا تَبۡغُوا۟ عَلَیۡهِنَّ سَبِیلًاۗ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ كَانَ عَلِیࣰّا كَبِیرࣰا)

[Surah An-Nisa’ 34]

 

(2)

(وَٱلۡمُطَلَّقَـٰتُ یَتَرَبَّصۡنَ بِأَنفُسِهِنَّ ثَلَـٰثَةَ قُرُوۤءࣲۚ وَلَا یَحِلُّ لَهُنَّ أَن یَكۡتُمۡنَ مَا خَلَقَ ٱللَّهُ فِیۤ أَرۡحَامِهِنَّ إِن كُنَّ یُؤۡمِنَّ بِٱللَّهِ وَٱلۡیَوۡمِ ٱلۡـَٔاخِرِۚ وَبُعُولَتُهُنَّ أَحَقُّ بِرَدِّهِنَّ فِی ذَ ٰ⁠لِكَ إِنۡ أَرَادُوۤا۟ إِصۡلَـٰحࣰاۚ وَلَهُنَّ مِثۡلُ ٱلَّذِی عَلَیۡهِنَّ بِٱلۡمَعۡرُوفِۚ وَلِلرِّجَالِ عَلَیۡهِنَّ دَرَجَةࣱۗ وَٱللَّهُ عَزِیزٌ حَكِیمٌ)

[Surah Al-Baqarah 228]

 

(3)

حَدَّثَنَا خُشَيْشُ بْنُ أَصْرَمَ، حَدَّثَنَا عَبْدُ الرَّزَّاقِ، حَدَّثَنَا مَعْمَرٌ، عَنِ الزُّهْرِيِّ، عَنْ عُرْوَةَ، عَنْ عَائِشَةَ، قَالَتْ جَاءَتْ هِنْدٌ إِلَى النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فَقَالَتْ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ إِنَّ أَبَا سُفْيَانَ رَجُلٌ مُمْسِكٌ فَهَلْ عَلَىَّ مِنْ حَرَجٍ أَنْ أُنْفِقَ عَلَى عِيَالِهِ مِنْ مَالِهِ بِغَيْرِ إِذْنِهِ فَقَالَ النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم ‏ “‏ لاَ حَرَجَ عَلَيْكِ أَنْ تُنْفِقِي عَلَيْهِمْ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ ‏”‏ ‏.‏

Narrated ‘Aishah: Hind came to the Prophet (ﷺ) and said: Messenger of Allah, Abu Sufyan is a stingy person. Is there any harm to me if I spend on his dependents from his property without his permission? The Prophet (ﷺ) replied: There is no harm to you if you spend according to the custom.

Sunan Abi Dawud 3533